- I had the best day today. A picnic in a beautiful big park with my babes and my someone. The weather was cool but the sky was so perfectly blue. I hope winter stays this way.
- My babies are in bed, sound asleep, and I’m snuggled on the lounge with my two year old nephew, who is enthralled in Monster Jam.
- I haven’t been able to spend much time on Tumblr in the last week or so and I miss it. I feel like I just float on here and like a few things and then have to go and do something else.
- All the drama in my life has finally died down. It has been a really disappointing time for me in some ways. When you’re subjected to psychological abuse so often it’s hard to come to terms with the fact that, if there is no physical evidence like bruises, people couldn’t give a shit what happens to you. Not many people understand that that kind of abuse is a terrible head fuck. You’re broken forever, in some ways. Even when you think you aren’t.
- In the same breath, I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I’m in an amazing place right now. And I do keep remembering to stop and smell the roses and think, this is wonderful. And just taking the time to do that makes my mood so much brighter. I still have my days, my frustrations, and my problems haven’t completely disappeared, but my outlook is clearer and I am free to enjoy so much more now. Thats what it really comes down to; I’m free.
- I’m still sore from the accident. Sore back, wrists, shoulders and neck. It sucks but it could have been worse. I’m so thankful Lucas was not harmed at all.
- Since things have been better, I’ve had this strong urge to record my memories more. I’m not sure exactly why, maybe it’s because I want to remember how great things are. I’m taking photos of everything again, I’m going to post to Instagram more, and I’m going to start scrapbooking again. Scrapbooking can be a complete money suck and that, along with my relationship issues in the last few years, turned me right off it. It was pointless to me. But this time around I just want it simplified, basic supplies. I just want my memories and my babies memories put down in an attractive way, and I really need to focus my creative energy. I have a lot of it and I feel like I’m a bit stuck.
- I think I’m going to focus some of that creative energy here and update more since I’m trying to record these memories. I was in a funk where I thought my life was too mundane to post about but, mundane or not, it’s my life! I think it’s pretty awesome, anyway.
- Physically, I’m not feeling myself. Aside from injuries from the accident. Since its been cold, my skin is so dry. I haven’t been able to exercise in ages. I’m tired, and my energy levels are low. I haven’t been eating as good as I usually do. I’m slacking, and really I’m feeling it. Time to make some changes in that area.
- I’m really excited about The Great Gatsby coming out. I’m weary, because its one of my absolute favourite books, but I am hoping its great.
That was long. I’ve been keeping this all in way too long. I’d say I’m sorry but I’m not.
Look, I just want one…
Stay close to anything that makes you glad you are alive.
Grace Kelly at the 1955 Cannes Film Festival